“Sometimes, growing up means growing apart.”
“Should I say hi first?” I thought to myself. “It’s been quite a while and we really don’t talk…but I should say ‘hi’ with a smile…” Then she walked past and I ended up saying a curt hi. She replied briskly without a smile and my face was unusually straight. I could feel it.
As I walked away, I wished it wasn’t like that. I wished we were those kids that greeted one another for no reason, saw each other off to buy things for Mummy and visit each other’s place for little gist and novel exchange. We’ve become known strangers and it hurts…
It was hard to accept this turn of events but we seem to wear bigger clothes that make us feel bigger(proud). We’ve grown bigger in size and it has made us haughty in our thoughts. Its suddenly a competition between us on how differently we are growing up. Its a shame, we stopped being children at heart. Our young love is lost and we only look at the surface.
Last week, I saw Will Smith’s ‘Collateral Beauty’ (great movie), though it had nothing to do with growing up but it opened up a side to relationship that made me deeply ponder. There was a part where this line was mentioned, “If only we could be strangers again…”
I wish I could be a stranger to my childhood friends, where age, background, status, religion didn’t matter. We were curious, we were supportive, we were forgiving and it’s mind-shattering to see great friends walk away so casually. No longer friends but ‘Longtime neighbor’ as one of them described us.
What happened to the supportive days where my pen came alive because ‘they’ wanted to read every word I wrote? What happened to the novel exchange days, where we’ll give ourselves four days to finish a ‘Danielle Steel’, a ‘Nora Roberts’ or my favorite of all a ‘Sandra Brown’s novel? Geez! What went wrong?
Why did I stop loving that guy I fell madly in love with and I said my first ‘I love you’ to? Now I can barely stand him. And we had to grow apart due to little quarrel and unending resentments. It’s hard to watch someone I did crazy things with, draw an imaginary line with class. It’s even harder when I try to reconnect and I feel like I’m trying too hard or being pushy.
I cannot categorically say that I didn’t change but I can’t let go of the ‘they’ I knew. Interestingly, some stayed, some made growing up still relatable and we have stories to tell but a lot are lost… Those who would make my growing up story complete are absent.
“Hey! I miss our innocence. Can we be strangers again?” I will say to her with a smile and hope she would smile back, make my memories alive and this time, she doesn’t have to just walk past.
I miss my childhood friends… 😦
Author’s Name: Temitope Idowu
Blog Address: http://www.temitoria.com
Author’s Contacts: Youtube Channel– Temitoria; Instagram, Twitter, Facebook– @Temitoria
Author’s Bio: Temitoria is a Content Developer, YouTuber and Author. She loves being happy and she believes happiness comes from doing what you love.
© The Short Black Girl, 2017.