This is how it happened. 
I have known Babajide for a year now. We have spent quality time together, hung out like real buddies, watched movies together, shared CDs and novels and kisses and cuddles. Yes, we are cool like that! He works at Port harcourt, and travels down to Lagos to see his folks like once every three months. He is a muslim, a 21st Century classy, bad-ass and devout muslim. Plus, he’s a bad-ass cook too. Oh my Lord!! We met on Badoo, one of the most unlikely places I ever imagined to find someone i’d be very much into. From the first chat he sent in– “You look like a young Lauryn Hill”, which to me sounded like an award more than a compliment– I had known he’d be different in every other kind of way. And he is. I mean, Lauryn Hill (whom I didn’t know much about until that day) isn’t in my opinion gorgeous, or beautiful, or hot or sexy. She is one of those women you might have to know to love, rather than love to know– and because he attributed that feeling of abstractness, and innate beauty to me, he nailed me in without a sweat.

Back to the point! It’s quite obvious ‘m into him much as he appears interested in me. Every weekend when he pops in, we always make sure to hang out– whether at the movies or the beach, or his house or mine– but it’s never been past that. I mean, we are just friends. No, good friends. Scratch that! Best buddies. Babajide is one of such men that command your respect. He doesn’t demand from you, doesn’t cross the boundaries, he doesn’t even set boundaries; he just– lets things happen. While it’s a quite sexy thing, spontaneity and all of that, it gets nerve wrecking for a girl like me. I mean, every time we meet, I keep thinking maybe one day he’ll ask me out. Maybe one day he’ll suggest we took things further. He is 30, I am 26; we’ve both got fine jobs, he’s his own man, ‘m my own woman; we are adults, we are different but we like each other… so why not? Or maybe– oh no! Maybe he’s just being a nice guy. Maybe– maybe he doesn’t even love me. May– but! If he doesn’t love me, he wouldn’t chat me up all the time, he wouldn’t come visiting, he wouldn’t cook for me! Or would he?? Omg! I am near my wits end now. I wish Steven Harvey would write a book on ‘how to know a man loves you in 10 steps‘, or something close. I need to know where I stand in the scheme of things… Think! Think Sola! What can you do?

Bimbo! Bimbo! Yes, Bimbo. Bimbo is my writer girl- friend and well, school daughter. She lives in Portharcourt too, atm; where she’s serving the Nation at some elementary Primary School. Bimbo is very much like Jide. She is HOT, a bad ass Chess Player, spontaneous, watches movies and series like a maniac… so this is the plan– I suggest to Jide to meet my friend who’s hot, sexy, single to the tooth and very ready to mingle. If he loves me, he’ll come at me with a harsh “no, no!”– and if he doesn’t love me, he’d be like “oh? Alright. Let’s see a picture of her, shall we?” or something like that. Hey, don’t look at me like that! ‘m not a guy, I don’t know how you guys think, but I think I might just be close. So, I call Jide up, to hatch my plan. I shall maybe know where I stand tonight, with Babajide Okunola, my man of very little big words.

“Hey Jydo!”


“Good day at work today?”

“Yeah. Yeah. I just want a long shower and good rest now. You?”

“Yeah, me too!– err, you know I was chatting with my writer friend Bimbo who lives in PH recently, and she’s single.”

“Err. Okay?…”

“And I told her I have a friend in PH too, hot ass somebody, and he’s single too.”

“Hahahahha! No, you didn’t.”

“Well, I did. And I gave her your number and PIN. I hate that you have to be alone and by yourself over there.”

“Hahahah! You touch my heart with your kindness. Alright baby. We’ll see how it goes, won’t we?”

Spoiler Alert! Omg! Omg! No–

“Err… I guess we shall. Hahah! Alright buddy, fix a date and do let me know how it goes. Okay?”

“Sure will! Night darling.”

Tum Tum Tum– there goes the sound of the disconnecting call, and maybe the sound of my breaking heart too.

Maybe it’s true the saying– ignorance is bliss. Maybe I shouldn’t have done that. Maybe, maybe…


© The Short Black Girl, 2016.


32 thoughts on “Overthinker.

    1. Azzin eh! On the one hand, you’re glad that maybe you know where you stand– on the other hand, you’re like wtf just happened?! Hahah!

      Thanks for swinging by. Happy new year hr! ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Bwahahaha. Bimbo and Babajide kinda rhymes better than Sola and Babajide sha. Asin B² things. 😝
    Bhet because he said OK doesn’t mean he’s not into you tho Sola dear.

    Btwn. This kain thing can be nerve racking ehn. And it’s so difficult to just ask the dude a direct question, which is usually the only option.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Oh no Sheedart! Don’t, don’t do that… b sqaure or what?! Yaa just mean. Hahah!

      I know right. Maybe, maybe not. And it’s difficult to say “see Brother Jide, how fa na! You go do, abi you nur do?!” #thingswomengothrough

      Hehe. Thanks for swinging by hun! ❤

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Gah Tony, you read my mind well… ‘m like “but shill o Sola, what if– what if–”

      Thank you for reading and dropping a thought! We appreciate you. 😀 ❤


  2. He he…ignorance really is bliss…or maybe not. He just might meet up with her friend once and come back to her…arggh, I shouldn’t raise her hopes so much, it just might get crushed. Definitely love this, Me. Once again, you blew my my mind.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s going to be a great month, I can feel it in my b-o-n-e-s!! Ah, Kiddishrebel, ‘m so stoked you dropped my mine today; and more, that you enjoyed the read…

      And lol, i’ll be sure to extend your suggestions and thoughts to Sola. She’s been in tatters since that night. Poor girl.

      Thank you so much. ❤

      Liked by 2 people

  3. Oh Shoot and NOO…… You sooo DID NOT just serve up the object of your affection on a platter to not just anyone but your totally uber-cool girlfriend with a ‘Type A’ personality did you?! 😨🙊 Who does this??? 🙆What in the world were you thinking???? 😩 Were you even thinking at all?! 😟 Jeez Sola, JEEZ!!! 🙉

    First off, there are three kinds of people in this world…’Talkers’, ‘Thinkers’ and ‘Doers’! Of these three, the ‘Doers’ are the greatest! Jide’s a doer…he’s no flake! He elects and CHOOSES to spend his freetime with Sola when he could easily be at someplace else like say hooking up with his guys at some club or catching up with the activities of his favorite football club at some viewing centre in town, watching football if he’s some kinda soccer enthusiast and junkie! 😄

    ‘Action expresses priorities’ as affirmed by Mohandas Gandhi! So friggin’ what if he aint saying he wants to put a ring on it…just yet? 😏That something hasn’t happened don’t mean it aint gonna happen, it just means it hasn’t happened…. yet! Hehehe😈😆 My point, Sola oughta have thought things through properly before acting on a whim or ought that be that she oughta just quit thinking already…..’unthink’ and let things evolve naturally! Time’s the most precious thing we can give to anyone cause its not something we can recoup or get back! Jide hangs out with her every chance he gets doing fun things; and if that’s not a sure indication that he’s totally fallen into her, then I really don’t know what it is! Love wears no disguise, as much as we oft times try to hide it! Plus, this is especially true for introverted folks who are less expressive and will much rather ‘do’, that flap off of their gums! Hehehe

    The die is cast and its a fifty-fifty chance that Jide may or may not return back to Sola! He’d probably think she isn’t that into him, thus the mediator or go-between card she decided to deal him! Bimbo’s persona on the other hand, is the kind that totally reels and sucks one in! Jide would be pretty lucky to not get suckered up and swallowed by it! Again, he may well not if he’s the kinda guy George Jean Nathan referred to when he said ‘A man reserves his true and deepest love not for the species of woman in whose company he finds himself electrified and enkindled, but for that one in whose company he may feel tenderly drowsy’! Perfect lines huh?! 😍😁

    Oh Wow! Sola just had to make things pretty complicated! Talk bout creating the perfect storm and tempting fate! 😔 We don’t just get to toy with hearts; the heart does not take kindly to that and trust me, it’d revolt with a not-so-funny trick of its own that none would see coming! 👿😆

    Anyhows, Douglas Horton says to let go and set free that which we love and In the event that it does return back to us, then it means we did have it and oughta just love it forever! If however, it fails to return, then we never did have it in the first place! So then, that’d be as good a time as any for Sola to set her sights elsewhere! Better safe than sorry! *tsking

    As for me sha o, no can do ME; I’d NEVER do that! Nuh-uh! As in, for how na?! I mean, WHY??? Eish! Bwa-ha-ha-ha! 😂😂😂

    A true-to-life scenario you did paint here ME, oh sooo wondrously! ❤😃Talk bout totally playing oneself! Schuks! 😂😂😂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahaha! You reeled me in with every word in this one, Madam Yemie, and I may never fully get over the depth of wisdom and humour in this comment.

      One powerful thing ‘m noting today: “Action expresses priority”. It seems to just say everything. Yes, he was around more often than never; the signs were there; Sola should have waited– but for how long?

      We may never know now… #sigh

      Thank you so much ma’am. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

      1. For how long you ask ME and I’d be just be gabbing and telling a white lie through my teeth if I told you I had the answer to that bit! Hehehe

        But, rather than serve him up to another, if it was that important to her to know for a fact the future of that relationship; then she oughta just do the most logical thing…..let go of her pride and ask! How difficult could that have been? Trust me, whatever response came back from probing Jide, woulda served better than putting in a wrench into the mix and making matters really complicated! Now, it so checks out that there are mixed signals and if she does not right this ship by asking that which she requires a response to; then she may just have made a pretty grievous mistake that’d haunt her….forever and that’d be just sad! Tragic! 😔😣

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I guess there’s just the answer. Like it is said, “if Mohammed would not go and meet the mountain, the mountain can like to go and meet Mohammed.”

        Someone’s got to take the reins. And the woman might well do so if she must!

        Thank you so much. ❤

        Liked by 1 person

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